Hey everyone…it’s me…Gluten Dude. Can’t see me? I’m up here…on my pedestal. There you go!
Look…being a celiac can seriously suck sometimes. No need to sugarcoat it. And we’ve all had those “Crap…I didn’t pack any/enough food for the day!” moments. But when that happens, let’s lay the blame where it belongs. On us. Why am I bringing this up today? Good question. Let me explain.
I spent last week in Hong Kong visiting a friend. I know…interesting timing…but it was planned long ago. Great trip. Anyway, it was a 15 hour flight each way. When I booked the seats, I requested a gluten-free meal and let them know I had celiac disease. The flight took off at 1:00AM so dinner was served pretty quickly. Before it was served, a stewardess came over to me just to confirm that I requested a gluten-free meal. (Nice touch Cathay Pacific!)
So the food came and without even thinking about it, I ate the entire meal.
Just kidding.
The meal was labeled “Gluten Intolerant”. Good start. I know “Gluten Free” would have been better but semantics. Anyway, I tentatively opened it and it was empty inside. Kidding again. It was chicken, brown rice and veggies. Basic stuff…in a good way. Was it safe? Probably…though it did look like there MAY have been a sauce on it. So I sat there staring at my food for a few minutes. The woman next to me most likely thought I was saying a silent prayer. Instead, what I was doing was measuring the pros and cons. Well, measuring the cons anyway.
“Dude…get to the point! Did you eat it??”
I did not. I spent the next 14 hours drowning my sorrows and my hunger in red wine.
Yes I’m kidding once again. I was fine because I packed enough food in my carry-on to feed the entire airplane…and yes, that includes the pilots thanks for asking.
I am now 320 words into this post and I haven’t gotten to the point. Here it is:
There was this dude with celiac disease had a 10 hour flight, upgraded to a premium seat (I’m not sure why this is relevant, but it’s mentioned multiple times in the article) and requested a gluten-free meal. When he got on the flight, they had no record of his request. So they served him the only safe food they could muster up…popcorn and crisps. He got hangry. And he went on social media and bitched about it. And it was all over the news when it happened.
Look…is it a bummer? Sure it is. Do mistakes happen? Yep they do. Whose fault was it that he had nothing to eat? His. All his. You got a 10 hour flight and you’ve got celiac disease? You pack some dang food in your bag.
And yes…it really is that simple.
(Stepping off my pedestal now…using the emergency ramp.)
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